I Love My Job, I Love My Job, I Love My Job.....

I have been seriously feeling drained the past two weeks emotionally. Particularly with the studio. I feel that everywhere I turn I am getting parents who have complaints and frustrations. Most of them are completely wacko...I have heard it ALLLL, seriously, you would laugh. But then there are some that make me feel that I am just doing a HORRIBLE job. Sometimes I feel that my employees don't care about their job and that I work for them more than they work for me. I feel like I bend over backwards and still it is not good enough. Caviat: One mom did call me today thanking me for breaking my back for her daughter but 1 out of 15 incidents, who cares right!?

I love the concept of what I do and my greatest desire is for Chara to be the best organized, most encouraging, positive place for students and parents to be and for Christ's name to be glorified by the way we do business and teach dance. I have learned quite a few lessons that I am going to implement next year to make sure things work better and PEOPLE work better. Right now I just feel defeated and at the worst possible time...recital. Summer can not come quick enough!

1st Mommy Moment

A few weeks ago I was doing my Bible study when I had my first "I'm going to be a mommy moment" I call it. It was a story from a book and the topic was on generational sin and bondage. I had done this study before as a freshman in college and it has been interesting to do it again in this totally different season of my life. Here was the story:

"When I was little, my nurse Dibby's cousin had a dog, just a mutt, and the dog was pregnant. I don't know how long dogs are pregnant but she was due to have her puppies in about a week. She was out in the yard one day and got in the way of the lawn mower and her two hind legs got cut off. They rushed her to the vet and he said, "I can sew her up, or you can have her put to sleep if you want, but the puppies are okay. She'll be able to deliver the puppies." Dibby's cousin said, "Keep her alive." So the vet sewed up her backside and over the next week the dog learned to walk. She didn't spend any time worrying, she just learned to walk by taking two steps in the front and flipping up her backside and then taking two steps and flipping up her backside again. She gave birth to six little puppies, all in perfect health. She nursed them and then weaned them. And when they learned to walk, they all walked like her."

Lord, teach me how to walk more like you! Give Bobby and I grace as we raise this baby, protect it from our fleshly mistakes and human habits. Teach it to fear you and love you with all of its heart, mind and soul!

New York New York!

The past three months I seriously think have been the busiest of my life! Talitha, Mexico Mission Trip, Woman's Retreat, Contest Season, and the most fun, discovering we are having a baby. I feel that God has allowed me to do so many great things this year and even though I am tired and feel a bit burnt out I am so thankful for the beautiful experiences I have had this whirlwind of a winter!

I am really thankful that I got to go to New York with my mom and Kirsten's Drill Team a couple of weeks ago! It was so special to experience that with them and do some things I have always dreamed of doing. I think I may have had more fun than the girls! We got to see two shows, my favorite being Chicago, went to the Empire State Building, Time Square, Macy's, Statue of Liberty, World Trade Center, etc. The big highlight for me was taking a hip hop class at Broadway Dance Center and contemporary at Alvin Ailey. Being at Ailey was a pretty big experience for me. I was in awe. Oh to have a body and move like an Ailey dancer! :)

It was so fun to be with my mom and sister and see her interact with her team. Kirsten is such a great leader and so much fun to be with.

I also discovered that I have the natural talent it takes to be a Paparazzi. I spotted Edie Falco (Sopranos), Russel Simmons (I know, no one else knows who that is but me apparently), and Jake Gylenhaal while we were there! I discovered that I watch way to much TV.

Coming back home and having the first free weekend since Christmas was pretty shocking but enjoyable. Don't worry, I have plenty to do though with work coming up! Ballet Exams, Offerings Concert, Recital Pictures and oh yes, the dreaded recital weekend! I don't think I will be relaxing for long till summer.

Well if you haven't heard the news yet...you must not talk to our families very often! We are having a baby! We were a little stunned at first but are really excited God has "pushed" us over our cliff (or my cliff should I say) and into the deep sea of parenthood. The due date is October 11th and I can't wait till summer so we can find out if it is a girl or a boy and I can start decorating and getting clothes! We are really thankful that even though we thought this was a few months off, it was obviously easy to get pregnant and so far everything is looking good!

A Blessing

One of the biggest blessing of my life recently has been dancing with Talitha. If I haven't told you about Talitha yet, it is a part of a wonderful exciting conference for college age girls called Masterpiece. It is being held for the first time in College Station the last weekend in February. Driving to College Station each weekend for rehearsals has been a chore but my time in the car and the blessing of moving through the incredible choreography makes the gas guzzling worth it.

Way back in 2002 when God gave me the vision to start Chara, the performing arts being incorporated more in worship was one of my desires. I dreamed of the day where Chara would break down barriers in the College Station area dancing at places we never dreamed we would be allowed to go. Being a part of worship at churches and events and showing God's beauty through dance was something I was so passionate about and had faith that one day, after I was gone, those doors would be open. Masterpiece and Talitha is a part of that dream I had and I am so blessed to be able to be a part of it.

I feel that I have come full circle from 2002. Ironically, Masterpiece was created by Donna (Barker) Stewart who was my youth groups worship leader for a few years. I am also getting to dance with one of my dearest friends Steph, that I taught with but have never danced with, many current Chara members who have become dear friends, as well as former students who are now finishing school and getting married! It is a combination of some of the most special people from my days in College Station. I am so thankful for this experience and have faith that God is going to do amazing things in the heart of the young women He draws to this conference.

Can't wait to write about it after the event and post pictures!

I know it's late but...Christmas

I have been hoping to blog about our December for a few weeks now but have just been really busy...just like our Christmas was!

It started out by us hosting three "adult" parties at our house besides the usual youth group party. We enjoyed the company of my amazing staff, followed by Bobby's co-workers, and then a Pastor's Open House where our church was invited to stop by for wassail and goodies. This was all in one weekend intentionally so I only had to clean my house once with a few "maintenance" clean ups in between.

The studio had really successful Christmas performances this year that really worked for us. Our preschool students were divided up in groups and performed at to local retirement homes. They are always so sweet to watch and the residence just love it. That evening the rest of our students performed at Friendswood's Christmas in the Park following the Lighted Christmas Parade. This was a great venue for us as the park was able to hold all the families that came to watch and the community got to see what we are all about. I was really proud of my teachers for such a great job on their choreographer and preparing their girls. I hope we can do this event for years to come.





The next VERY big event in my families life was the much anticipated, much celebrated, much deserved graduation of my beautiful sister Halie from Texas Tech. My family road tripped it all the way to the LBK for the weekend for a whirlwind trip and to move her out. I am so proud of her dedication, strength and independence. She is such a great example of a strong, Godly young women. Young girls take note!

This was a fun bonding trip for my family as it has been a while since we have had this big of an adventure.






Going back to the beginning of the month we had Kirsten's show Holiday Follies which included the Kingwood Park dance, theater and choir department. It was really special as KP and I choreographed our fourth solo for her to perform, Silent Night. She turned into a ballerina in a 4 hour rehearsal, I was so proud of her! It was a fun performance. She also had the Kid's Krazy Christmas Show (which I like to call Kid's Krazy Kirsten Show). She has been in JUMP for all four years and this was her last year for the show. It always gets me in the Christmas spirit. I think I will have to go next year even if she isn't in it. :)





After all this, we finally had three days of Christmas with our families. Christmas Eve service was pretty special with Bobby's family singing Reliant K's "I Celebrate the Day". Bobby on bass, his dad on drums, his mom on the piano, and Allen singing and playing the guitar. Christmas Day us, my mom and sisters (since my dad had to work)went to the Kirkpatrick's and the next day we celebrated in Kingwood with our family included my cousin's which was a special treat.


As usual, our December is topped off with Friends Student Conference which was in Wichita this year. We took 40 students and chaperones and had a great time. I really enjoyed having my sister there to help us too. The kids were great and we really enjoyed the snow.

Active Mind Lately

Sooooo, funny how I haven't blogged in TWO MONTHS since I vowed to be more open with my blogging hu? Ha! Oh Shanna.

The good thing is that in the past two months my mind has been racing thinking about all sorts of things and pondering. This is not typical for Shanna Hartman Kirkpatrick. The usual Shanna does not "ponder", she "knows". Just ask Bobby, he will tell you that if you ever pose a question to me my response will NEVER be "let me think on that a while". Instead it will be "WELL, I feel that.....". It is not typical for me to have my heart softened to things by thinking. I am just not wired that way. I am wired to get down to business.

However, the past two months the Lord has been softening me to all sorts of things.

1. I have been feeling so much compassion lately. I cared about people before but now I am thinking about different people groups more than just when I am presented with them on the news or something. These "people groups" include animals too. :) In particular God has really made me aware of couples that are unable to have children. I have known quite a few personally who have either lost babies or who are unable to conceive and my defenses have come up when I hear comments to me or others like "how come you don't have any kids yet? Don't you want children?" or more recently I have heard "oh, don't worry about dropping him, babies are easy to come by. HAHA". These comments may be said with pure intentions or jokingly but I have just really been sensitive when I hear people say things like this. You never know who you are talking to for one thing and two, you don't know their personal situations. It has taught me to be aware of my surroundings and sensitive to the personal situations of others.

2. I have strangely been relaxing a lot lately and surprise, my job has actually not been suffering! This started when my computer died and I couldn't be on it all the time. Now I don't rush to check my email every morning and don't spend my whole day that the computer working. I have been keeping my house cleaner, spending more time with Bobby and brainstorming more about work than doing busywork. I love it!

3. A big development is that my sister Katherine and I are going to Rwanda on a mission trip in July. This is sooo not like me. I have greatly enjoyed our yearly mission trips to Mexico but it is not like me to jump into a three week trip like this. I am a homebody and I especially love being home in the summer. Usually Bobby is the one gallivanting around the globe. We have quite a few missionaries in Rwanda from our church and I have really felt connected to what they are doing since one of them was a girl who grew up in our church and the other is a couple who stayed with Bobby and I for a week last year. I have always told myself that I wanted to go to Rwanda either before I had kids or when they were older, I just didn't expect it this summer. However Katherine and I dove in when we heard about our churches trip. Diving in for me is a good thing. That way I don't talk myself out of it. :) I am nervous about being away for that long but am excited to have this experience, see what God is doing there, and to be a part of these missionaries lives for a few weeks. I am also excited to go dance with the Africans. It is on my bucket list. :)

Currently, we have been busy with various Christmas things. Bobby and I went to Kingwood to watch Kirsten in the theater, dance and choir department's "Holiday Follies" for which Kirsten and I choreographed her solo. This weekend we have three Christmas parties at our house that I am getting ready for, Bobby's staff party, my staff party and a church wide pastors open house. Yikes! Saturday the studio has their Christmas ministry performances. The preschoolers will be dancing at various nursing homes and the older kids will be dancing at Friendswood's Christmas in the Park! I am looking forward to it, I think it will be a big statement for our studio in front of so many people in the community for the first time. I really hope that people see that we are different and why. And NEXT weekend all the Hartman's will be road tripping it to Lubbock to see Halie graduate! I would Whoop but she is a Tech-y. :)